An appetizer

I just got back from a roadtrip to Chicago and am in the process of compiling pictures So until then, here's a little appetizer to whet your appetite. It has not failed to make people laugh, and I doubt you will be able to keep a straight face.

Ready?

True story k?

Alrights, here we go.

So 2 weeks ago, the Asian-American student association took part in an international food showcase and as tradition demands it, we made egg rolls. 500 of them to be exact. So on Wednesday night, we were in the cafeteria kitchen rolling them thingies. About 300 egg rolls into the night, I had to run half way across campus to make sure a student group had everything they needs to start their event.

So I yank off my gloves, wash my chickeny hands and take off running to the business school. I find the people in charge and give the speech that I've given a hundred times before: "Himynameiscarynandiworkwithcampustechnologyijustwanttomakesurethatyouhavealltheequiptmentyouneedforyoureventtonight..."

They stare at me and are like, "you work with WHO?" At this point I think they are kinda rude for looking at me like I'm some weirdo from mars decending on them, but I reply nicely, "I work with Campus Technology. Do you have everything you need for your event tonight?" They assure me they are fine, and I happily take off so I can get back to rolling egg rolls. But as I exit the business school, I see my reflection in the door. And my instantly, my ego level hit rock bottom.

I had forgotten to take my hair net off.

Long live the Nokia.

I own a Nokia. To be specific, I own a brick of a NOKIA spelled with capitals instead of a sleek and pretty nokia spelled with italics. Its the only type of phone I should be allowed to have, because of its apparent resistance to abuse.

No, I'm not talking about the occasional 3 foot drop from the table to the floor. I'm not even referring to the time I was jogging down the road and the NOKIA leaped out of my pocketsess onto the gravel road and broke into like 352 pieces. Of course I picked up every one of those 491 pieces and put it back together, and voila! It worked.

I am referring to today when I visited the Ladies. After I did my business, I flushed and turned around. At that moment the NOKIA leaped out of my pocketsess (again!!) into the water.

*The next part is censored*

So I ran to the sink to wash my hands and the phone. And pulled everything apart, resisting the urge to turn it on, I went back to the office, pulled out a floor fan and directed it at my phone, leaving it there for a good 4 hours.

And let me tell you what, when we put it back together and turned it on, the NOKIA lived. Not only that, my SMS service which had previously been dead was miraculously resurrected. I tell you, toilet water is the new wonder drug.

Long live the NOKIA.

My talent in life.

Caryn did what she was best at and locked herself out of her room again. She thought she'd share that with the world. Not that the world reads her blog. Not that she wishes the world reads her blog. She really doesn't want the world to read her blog.

Caryn did what she was best at and went off topic...

1 picture, 3 stories.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. This one, is worth 3 stories.


Story #1: Malachite Green Stain
Klumsies like me should not be allowed in Science Labs. Chances are that when performing a bacterial microscope slide stain, klumsies like me will choose the Malachite Green Stain with the loose cover and proceed to spill it all over the table. Chances are that klumsies like me will also get it all over their hands and arms. (Be thankful I'm not showing you the other side of my hand!!) Also note that klumsies like me do not possess special skin that allows the dye to be washed off. I guess klumsies like me will just have to be resigned to freakish alien-green splotches of skin for the next few weeks.

Story #2: Home Alone
I am home alone. The roommates have abandoned me and gone to Boston for some conference. That's the reason why I am not in my room but am in the kitchen, taking over the dining table (and every other square inch of the living room). Muahaha. I bet I'll miss them after a while, but for the next few days I reign supreme.

Story #3: Curry Mee
Sue me, but when you are marooned on a yummiliciousless country, you get rather excited about food from home. Check out the bowls of curry mee over my left shoulder waiting for my friends to come and consume. *drools*

Excuse me, I need to go and wipe away my drool. Peace.

In the event of a carb overload...

Here comes another Friday night,

And she squeals aloud in pure delight,
For a swift glide over satin ice,
Alas she falls not once but twice.

Just so you know, I've been skating ever since I was 8. But you know what? I've been falling since the day I was born, and I guess I just am better at that.

She falls butt-first on the ground,
A gasp or two comes from around,
Up she pops with a smile for all,
And limps to the bench against the wall.

Knocking one's tailbone out of alignment certainly makes one famished. And after a carb overload, we felt the need to scale a fence and sneak into the baseball field to work off the extra glucose in our systems.

In the event of a carb overload,
Take a short run across the road,
Jump a fence and pose on the mound,
All the while dancing and prancing around.

It is not recommended that...

It is not recommended that...

...you step on a sheet of ice to avoid treading on mud. Chances are that the ice will shatter under your weight and you will plunge into a pool of liquid mud-slush. Removing your foot from the brown goo immediately is a must - unless you wish to marinate it in the cold icky unknown.

So go forth and avoid pud-muddles.

Thank you!

I've never...

I've never had a week like this before. I've never worked a 40 hour week before. I've never done so much shopping on foot before. I've never hugged/been hugged so many times in 7x24 hours before. I've never eaten so many sandwiches before. I've never been so disorientated before. I've never run head first into a glass door before. But that's a different post.

I've never worked a 40 hour week before. I seriously considered doing a 30 hour week instead, considering the fact that my body clock was still set unto Malaysian time. But the 2 other student employees in the A/V department stopped working for one reason or another. That left me, boss, and a one week old new guy. And I tell you, Orientation Week is not the time to be understaffed. We had events galore to set up, mend and tear down. So this girl found herself running around campus like a headless chicken. Like two headless chickens. No, like three headless chickens. But then again, the extra cash couldn't hurt, especially since...

I've never done so much shopping on foot before. I guess I could ask someone to give me a ride, but I really really hate asking people for favours when I don't really have to. Setting up 'house' can be fun, I guess...but at the expense of my calves. That is, my lower legs, not my baby cows. I don't have baby cows.

I've never hugged/been hugged so many times in 7x24 hours before. I'm not a huggie wuggie person. Never was, never will be, even though I've improved SOOO much already. But yes, I've violated many people's personal space this week.

I've never eaten so many sandwiches before. My pots and pans aren't here yet. So I've been sandwiching for the past week. I did, however throw together a egg-bake for dinner today. Literally closed my eyes, crossed my fingers, dumped everything into a bowl and dumped the bowl in the oven. It was edible. Just so you know.

I've never been so disorientated before. Consider this:
Boss: Could you run down to the scene shop and ask them for two mic stands?
Me: Okay. *walks off* Wait, am I going in the right dirrection?
Boss: No.
Me: Yeah, that's right. *walks off in another wrong dirrection*

I've never had a week like this before. It hasn't been bad. But I'm sure glad it only comes once a year.

Because some things shouldn't be left unsaid.

I uh...

uh...

uh...

...

...

...walked ran into a glass wall today.


I hate glass doors.

No wonder my nose is so flat.


I wonder if I'm really just jet lagging. Or if this goofiness is a permanent, unchangeable feature that I will have to endure for the rest of my life.

Some things are too embarrassing to be made known to the world. Other things are too hilariously embarrassing to be left unsaid. This is one of them.

I'll take the jet without the lag.

The cow went back to work today. Truth be told, she wouldn't have minded sleeping in and playing the "jet lag" card. But doing that would throw her off schedule for a week (or two). So she went back to work, and told the boss to keep her busy or she'd collapse on him.

Honestly, my brain isn't quite functional yet. On more than one occasion, I'd turn left when I should have turned right. So I spent the good part of today wandering around campus, stopping, looking embarrassed, and turning around. Then, I took my lunch break and went to the bank. to do stuff. I got there fine, but I forgot how to get back. Sorta. Haha. I missed a turning. But that's normal. I'm forever missing turnings, and forgetting to get off at stations, and taking the wrong buses anyways.

But besides all that, I survived the 9-5 day, went to the walmarts to find food, came back, ate dinner, and collapsed. Thank goodness I got a call at 10ish, if not I'd still be curled up at the foot of my bed, dead to the world.

Did it occur to you that...

Did it occur to you that...

...maybe a klutz like me shouldn't be allowed remotely near the kitchen?


Injury #2 was incurred while putting an end to the demonically thick and hard skin of the pumpkin. Bad pumpkin. Bad bad pumpkin.

But the forces of good prevailed. The pumpkin is now a soup.

...

Moving on to happier, not so painful topics...

Badminton.

Which reminds me...my arm is sore. Dang.

*sizzzzzzzzzzzle*

I got bit by the baking bug.
Like literally.

Link here.

DongDong

Repeat after me.
.

I...

...I

.

am...

...am

.

a...

...a

.

DongDong...

...DongDong!

.

.

I really hope you replaced "I" with "Caryn" or "Cow". Coz if you didn't...maybe YOU deserved it.

.

But anyways...this DongDong left her handphone underneath her pillow and went on a 4 day roadtrip with her family. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry or curl up and die. (Hey! That rhymes!!)

.

But yes, the joke's on me. My name is now Cow Tan Dong Dong.

Life is a Highway...

Pa took me driving today. Rather I took Pa driving, if you get what I mean.

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Before you read on, I DID NOT KILL ANYONE. Thank you for reading and understanding that.

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It was a peaceful drive, Pa and I being such gentle people. Now if Mum was there, there would probably be more sound waves in the car. But Mum reads my blog, so we shall divert from that topic. That being said, Pa's legs did shoot out a few times...like an octopus. But Pa reads my blog, so we shall divert from that topic as well.

.

But as I said, I DID NOT KILL ANYONE. And that's all that matters.

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On the topic of cars, have you ever tried getting out of a car while still wearing a seatbelt? It makes you feel THAT smart. But then watching someone else do the exact same thing makes everything better. *grins*

To Lah or not to Lah.

Got many people tell me that I still use "lah". Then today, I tried to say "la" oso cannot wan. So saddening you know o' not?

Brrr. I think I'm traumatized from typing *points upwards* that. Its one thing speaking like that, and another actually typing it out. Brrr.

Anyways, after dinner, I trotted downstairs to throw trash rubbish. And on the way up, I decided to "Selamat Malam" the guards so they won't think I am a snotty pastor's kid who just came back from the US of A. But instead, this twinkie banana opened her mouth and "Semamat Mamamed" the guards.

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Got many people tell me that I still use "lah". But then again...

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p.s. This is a twinkie: yellow on the outside, and white on the inside.

R&R

*snuggles into a warm ball of contentment*

Ahh...after a rather long week last week...I had a nice day of R&R today...my 2 1/2 hour lab class got cancelled...and I purposely took the day off from work so that I could have an extra long break. Man it was good!

Sure I spent the whole time preparing a presentation for my evening class...but that 6 hours to myself was joy.

*snuggles snuggle snuggle*


On a seperate note...I fell down the other day, and skinned my knee...the same knee that has a marvolous "V" shaped scar from tripping and falling on some rocks...the same knee that has a lovely discolouration from the time I fainted, busted my knee open, and let it get infected.

I now have another scar to my collection...but what amused me the most was...the moment I fell down, my friend goes, "Gosh, Caryn, you are so clumsy."

I guess I haven't changed that much.

Of Alarms and Mice

...and today, I tried to use my phone as my mouse.

I need more sleep.

Of Mice and Alarms.

Ever since that fateful day when I slept through my 9 am class...I've been using 2 alarms: my clock and my phone. So if one fails, the other will save me. And if the other fails, I'll have to change my blog to "I am pig, hear me oink..."

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So this morning, my clock went off...and I smashed it to smithereens. Then 5 minutes later, my phone went off...and I grabbed it, and repeatedly pressed the snooze button.

The dungu alarm still wouldn't go off.

And there was this annoying clicking noise...click, click, click...so I peaked one eye open...and there I was, holding my laptop mouse, clicking away.

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No wonder the dungu alarm wouldn't go off.

Aiyo...this has gotta stop.

We are still on the series of The Dingdongness of the Cow.
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So this time, I overslept and missed my first class of the semester. Funny thing was, I went to bed before 11pm last night and didn't get up till 9:30 am. I am an amazing sleeper.

.

Well, if that 10 1/2 hours of sleep didn't get rid of that pending flu bug that is threatening to explode in my nasal cavities, I don't know what will. Don't worry mum, I'm pouring vitamin C down my throat as though I am a sailor bailing out water on a sinking ship.

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...as though I am a sailor bailing out water on a sinking ship...

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I have weird analogies.

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uh...whatever. Moving on!

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Before I get any blurer and forget to wish Hannah "Happy Birthday!"...
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Hannah Ong, Happy 21st Birthday. You are amazing.
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Hannah, I drew this when I was stuck in Memphis for 24 hours. Consider that your birthday pressent!

The poor unfortunate finger.

Today, I dissected a cat.

Ewww. Sorry la, but it's part of my course work. After convincing myself that that lump of matted fur was actually a chicken in disguise, I went to work. *snip snip snip*

I got carried away and snipped a hole in my latex glove where my finger was...and the lovely formaldehyde/cat juice flowed in. Ewww.

Now my left index finger smells like cat juice. Incidentally, it's the same finger that got stuck to my right hand with glue. The poor unfortunate finger.

Once it starts...

Once it starts...it won't go away.

My Blur-Streak has started again. After two months of normalness, I'm back to being clumsy, forgetful, blur and cowlike. Here's what happened:

Yesterday was daylight savings, that means we turn our clocks one hour ahead (losing one hour), so that we get more daylight time. Make sense? Anyways, I forgot. I knew about it, but I forgot.

So I set my handphone alarm for 8:30 am. It rings, I snooze, snooze, snooze until 9:00 am. Then I wake up, wash up, and get some studying done. At 10:30 am, I grab my handbag and start walking to church. On my way out of the dorm, I meet a bunch of girls who remind me it's daylight savings.

Oh dieeee...I forgot to set my clocks forward. I'm late for church.

So I run back up, ask God to please excuse my dingdongness (after all, that's how He made me right? =P), and change out of my clothes. 10 minutes later, it hits me...Wait, doesn't my phone automatically set itself forward?

I feel my IQ level drop.

Drop.

Drop.

Yeah, I wasn't late for church, but now I am. So I change back into my clothes and getready to go to church. AGAIN.

God, please excuse my dingdongness. After all, that's how You made me right?