Skinny Jeans and Bathing Rituals

I don't get skinny jeans. I really don't. Maybe its because I've been "blessed"
(under protest) with a bootilicious rear end. And skinny jeans really makes that bootiliciousness even more bootilicious. And me no likey bootilicious.

But the fashion industry cares not for people like me. If the trend is skinny jeans, well, they are gonna produce skinny jeans. And people like me have two choices: buy the skinny jeans and look like a carrot, or shop hop for weeks on end without any progress. I chose the latter.

Well, I finally got my unskinny jeans. But it made me remember how body conscious we females are. I mean, some of us even have hair washing rituals. Yes, hair washing can be a religious experience. Kinda. Here's the story.

Oh, and that picture is just to make you laugh. Back to the story.

It was 12 midnight and a group of "orang muda yang tak guna" were lepaking making a nuisance of themselves. Amongst them was a "orang yang tak begitu muda tapi masih muda la" who was provoking the nuisance.

For those of you who speaketh not the language of my country, here's the translation:

• Orang muda yang tak guna - useless youths
• Lepaking - hanging out
• Orang yang tak begitu muda tapi masih muda la - A not so young but still young person...la.

So the Orang Masih Muda (OMM) had just found out that she and one of the Orang Muda Tak Guna (OMTG) had the same bathing ritual as her.

OMM: So ya, I shampoo my hair first...
OMTG: And then rinse...then put the conditioner...
OMM: But cannot rinse yet...
OMTG: Must let it sit, so soap the body first...
OMM: Wait a while...
OMTG: THEN only rinse. Start with the body then the hair...
OMM: So that the conditioner has a few more moments to soak in the hair...

Realising that they were kindered spirits in the realm of hair washing, they excitedly gave each other high fives. But wait, there's more.

OMM: Actually right, there's something else I do...
OMTG: Which is?
OMM: You probably think its stupid...
OMTG: Tell la...
OMM: Well, do you comb your hair when you wash it?
OMTG: Of course...
OMM: Coz right, you need to wash your comb, so I run it thru after I apply shampoo.
OMTG: Serious? So do I!!! Like that the shampoo will clean the comb.
OMM: YEAH!!
OMTG: And after you comb after conditioning it too right?
OMM: To make sure the conditioner reaches each strand?
OMTG: EXACTLY!!!
OMM: Do you comb from front to back or back to front?
OMTG: Back to front!!!
OMM: ME TOO!!!
OMTG: So you loose hair from the back instead of the front right?
OMM: YA YA!!!

And so that is the story of how the Orang Masih Muda and the Orang Muda Tak Guna realised that they were not alone in the world. Someone out there thought exactly the way they did, and it brought much joy and comfort to know that they weren't so weird after all.

I've long passed the adolescent stage where I wished my flat nose could exchange places with my not so flat booty. After all, the flat nose is the dominant gene in the family - there's no running from THAT. And no matter how many lunges and butt squeezes you do, nothing's gonna change the fact that God made your hip bones THAT wide. Besides, contrary to popular belief, you can lipo fat away from your hips, but bones...bones are there to stay.

So we females content ourselves with making the best of the one thing we can change - we wash our hair. And we wash it good.