An appetizer

I just got back from a roadtrip to Chicago and am in the process of compiling pictures So until then, here's a little appetizer to whet your appetite. It has not failed to make people laugh, and I doubt you will be able to keep a straight face.

Ready?

True story k?

Alrights, here we go.

So 2 weeks ago, the Asian-American student association took part in an international food showcase and as tradition demands it, we made egg rolls. 500 of them to be exact. So on Wednesday night, we were in the cafeteria kitchen rolling them thingies. About 300 egg rolls into the night, I had to run half way across campus to make sure a student group had everything they needs to start their event.

So I yank off my gloves, wash my chickeny hands and take off running to the business school. I find the people in charge and give the speech that I've given a hundred times before: "Himynameiscarynandiworkwithcampustechnologyijustwanttomakesurethatyouhavealltheequiptmentyouneedforyoureventtonight..."

They stare at me and are like, "you work with WHO?" At this point I think they are kinda rude for looking at me like I'm some weirdo from mars decending on them, but I reply nicely, "I work with Campus Technology. Do you have everything you need for your event tonight?" They assure me they are fine, and I happily take off so I can get back to rolling egg rolls. But as I exit the business school, I see my reflection in the door. And my instantly, my ego level hit rock bottom.

I had forgotten to take my hair net off.

Accidents do happen.

In the perfect world, where I am calm and composed, this is what would happen:

Me: So last night while I was filming...there was an accident.
Boss: What happened?
Me: There were some guys standing next to the video camera...and I guess one of them had one bean too many for dinner.

But in the real world...this is what really happened:

Me: Um, boss?
Boss: Yeah?
Me: Last night when I was filming...uhh...*stutters/turns red/laughs*...this guy...HEEHEEHEE...he uh...he uh...passed gas...HOOHOOHOO...it was reeeeeally loud...I think its on the tape...*high pitch voice*...I SWEAR IT WASN'T ME!!! *snort*

In the real world, I'm not the put together gentlelady I wish I was. I snort and turn tomato-red and almost pee in my pants on occasion. But real world or dream world, this was ROTF funny. Cause we downloaded the tape today. And holy cow, it was loud.

'ell week 2

My boss proclaimed last week to be 'ell week. Seems like every single organization under the sun is trying to push in "one last event" before the academic year goes out. And the boss and his little minions get to set up for every single one of these events.

Being a minion sounds cute. But that's the extent of anything positive that has to go with that. That is besides being paid. Pay is good too.

So yeah, that was last week. This week was 'ell x2. Because on top of work, lecturers are beginning to realize that there are only 2 weeks left of the semester to give homework, quizzes, tests, papers and presentations.

And so, coffee has become part of my life again.

Pweeety

You have no idea how badly my mood is affected by the weather. For the past 3 months, I'd get cranky each time I stepped out of my apartment. Like seriously, I'd get an instant mood crash. Its not even funny.

I know you are laughing.

Stop it.

But today was pretty. Almost like Windows 7.

*sidetrack*
Boss: So what do you know about Windows 7?
Me: [dreamy look] Its pweety...
Boss: [rolls eyes]

So yes, today was a very pweety day, full of sunshine and comparatively warm air. I think I see a glimer of light through the tunnel. Winter's over, baby!

I need to...

work out.

And no, I don't mean go to the gym. I do that enough. Okay fine, I don't do it enough, but I do go every other day which is pretty impressive for my lazy bum. What I do mean is that I need to be able to lift amplifiers and transport a cart load of computers and haul a/v carts with flat tires without having my face turn purple. And dismount projectors and mount them back on to the ceiling without feeling like a taugeh.

You see, last year, I had a semester of weight training (which I still have no idea how I got into) and you guys saw the result when I came home last summer. Well, lets just say that I have lost some of that buffness and regained most of my ability to become a purple taugeh.

Today I realized that as I attempted to dismount a huge-a** projector without falling flat on my face and have it fall on top of me. That would definitely bring the height of my nose into the negative.

Eventually it came down. I fixed it, and eventually it went back up. But something tells me that maybe I should venture to the other side of the gym...away from the female dominated cardio machines...into the realm of egoistic guys pumping iron...and blow the dust off the pink 5 pound dumbbells.

Maybe.

Or maybe I will remain a purple taugeh.

Back to work.

On Monday, I dragged my lazy Christmas/New Year fed butt back to work. I ran to 4 shops to buy 4 envelopes to ship 4 textbooks to 4 different people. I wrote 4 address on the 4 envelopes to (hopefully the right) 4 people. Then I went back to work.

On Tuesday, my alarm went off at 8. I texted my boss to say I'd be an hour late. I went back to bed. My alarm went off at 9. I went to the toilet and instantanously lost 3 pounds, crawled back to bed and texted my boss to say I won't be in till after lunch (maybe). I didn't go back to work. And it was AWESOME.

On Wednesday, I'm back to work. Maybe I should call in sick again. That sounds mighty tempting.

Week 8

Week 8 has probably has been one of the AWFULEST week ever.

Not really. It wasn't awful at all. I just wanted to make an impression. I like making impressions. It is fun. The end.

Actually, week 8 has been a rather nice and easy going week. We are ejekly halfway through the semester which means that it is midterms. Which means that all the profs think we are stressed out, which means they all stop giving us assignments. I like.

But back to awful. Let just say technology hasn't been kind to me. And considering the fact that I work for Campus Technology...that isn't a good thing - workwise. So I was manning 2 major events in the past 2 weeks, and as I said, technology wasn't kind to me and there was absolutely nothing I could do. But I shore looked bad.

Looking bad I can handle. Because I know it ain't my fault. But now the A/V department is under scrutiny and we have to build our reputation up again. That I can handle as well. What I can't handle is how everyone's being so nice to me. Would someone gimme a scolding? Please?

Then maybe I'll stop feeling bad about how nobody is blaming me even though its not my fault.

I'm weird.

And I'm proud of it!

The Cow is...

...hijackingalaptop.thatissupposedtostreamavideo.butthatdidn'twork.s
otheyaredoingthedramafirst.whilethecowisituphere.hijackingthelaptop
.thatissupposedtostreamthatvideo.

Small Fry

Sometimes, being a small fry at the bottom of the food chain ain't such a bad thing after all. Leave the big guys to figure it out.

Fire in the hole!

My boss likes to fire me on a daily basis. Me thinks he thinks its good for my soul or something.

Boss: [walking past me] You're fired.
Me: [not looking up] Thank you.
Boss: [stops, turns around] What?
Me: [looking up] What?
Boss: Did you just thank me?
Me: Yea, I've to think of a new reply each time you fire me!
Boss: Haha! Well that's the best I've heard.

I tell you, one day, he's gonna fire me for real, and I'm not gonna believe him. But that's a different story.


And here is yet a different story:
So I toasted my bread. It got NICELY toasted. The smoke detector went off. The sprinklers started shoooooting out water. I nearly died.

Fine, the sprinklers didn't go off, but I nearly died anyhow - I thought I was gonna flood my apartment. I tell you, these American smoke alarms are dingdong sensitive.

The story of 3 girls and a roach

This is the story of 3 girls and a roach.

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, lived 3 princesses trapped in an office. And then, one of them saw a handsome prince riding on a rippling white steed cockroach...

SCENE 1

Mulan: Eeeek! Don't look.
Ariel: What?
Mulan: Don't look. *jumps on chair*
Ariel: What!
Mulan: Roach.
Ariel: Eeeeek! Where?!?! *curls up legs* I hate cockroaches!

[Enter Princess Belle]
Belle: Why's everyone sitting like that?
Ariel: There's a roach in the room.
Belle: Eeeeek!! *jumps on chair* Where!?!?!
Ariel: Behind the I-Mac!
Mulan: I hate roaches. (sorry krystal!!)
Belle: What should we do?
Ariel: Call a prince boy!
Belle: Good idea.

[Exit Princess Belle]

SCENE 2

[Enter Princess Belle into Obviously Not a Prince's Office]
Belle: There's a cockroach outside.
Obviously Not a Prince: But I'm wearing my good shoes!

[Princess Belle enters Snow White's office]
Belle: Snow White, there's a cockroach outside!
Snow White: I'm coming!

SCENE 3

...cut the long story short, snow white tries to find the roach, fails to do so, returns to her office...

SCENE 4

Ariel: Eeeeeek!!!! There it is!
Mulan: Where?!?!
Ariel: It's coming at me!
Belle: I'll get Snow White!
Ariel: Eeeeeeek!!!! Go away! *Pushes chair backwards*
Mulan: *grabs newspaper, runs to roach, closes eyes, EEEEEK!, throws newspaper, & runs away*
Everybody: EEEEEEEK!!!

[Enter Snow White]
*picks up newspaper to reveal a very squished bug, squishes it again with glass slipper & walks away*

THE END

This is the reason why Disney doesn't hire me to write their scripts.

I've never...

I've never had a week like this before. I've never worked a 40 hour week before. I've never done so much shopping on foot before. I've never hugged/been hugged so many times in 7x24 hours before. I've never eaten so many sandwiches before. I've never been so disorientated before. I've never run head first into a glass door before. But that's a different post.

I've never worked a 40 hour week before. I seriously considered doing a 30 hour week instead, considering the fact that my body clock was still set unto Malaysian time. But the 2 other student employees in the A/V department stopped working for one reason or another. That left me, boss, and a one week old new guy. And I tell you, Orientation Week is not the time to be understaffed. We had events galore to set up, mend and tear down. So this girl found herself running around campus like a headless chicken. Like two headless chickens. No, like three headless chickens. But then again, the extra cash couldn't hurt, especially since...

I've never done so much shopping on foot before. I guess I could ask someone to give me a ride, but I really really hate asking people for favours when I don't really have to. Setting up 'house' can be fun, I guess...but at the expense of my calves. That is, my lower legs, not my baby cows. I don't have baby cows.

I've never hugged/been hugged so many times in 7x24 hours before. I'm not a huggie wuggie person. Never was, never will be, even though I've improved SOOO much already. But yes, I've violated many people's personal space this week.

I've never eaten so many sandwiches before. My pots and pans aren't here yet. So I've been sandwiching for the past week. I did, however throw together a egg-bake for dinner today. Literally closed my eyes, crossed my fingers, dumped everything into a bowl and dumped the bowl in the oven. It was edible. Just so you know.

I've never been so disorientated before. Consider this:
Boss: Could you run down to the scene shop and ask them for two mic stands?
Me: Okay. *walks off* Wait, am I going in the right dirrection?
Boss: No.
Me: Yeah, that's right. *walks off in another wrong dirrection*

I've never had a week like this before. It hasn't been bad. But I'm sure glad it only comes once a year.

I'll take the jet without the lag.

The cow went back to work today. Truth be told, she wouldn't have minded sleeping in and playing the "jet lag" card. But doing that would throw her off schedule for a week (or two). So she went back to work, and told the boss to keep her busy or she'd collapse on him.

Honestly, my brain isn't quite functional yet. On more than one occasion, I'd turn left when I should have turned right. So I spent the good part of today wandering around campus, stopping, looking embarrassed, and turning around. Then, I took my lunch break and went to the bank. to do stuff. I got there fine, but I forgot how to get back. Sorta. Haha. I missed a turning. But that's normal. I'm forever missing turnings, and forgetting to get off at stations, and taking the wrong buses anyways.

But besides all that, I survived the 9-5 day, went to the walmarts to find food, came back, ate dinner, and collapsed. Thank goodness I got a call at 10ish, if not I'd still be curled up at the foot of my bed, dead to the world.

Workstudy Presentations

Sometime last year, I told you all that I'd tell you what my job was about when I figured it out. I finally figured it out.

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Anyways, Workstudy Presentations were today. So, enjoy.

Please excuse the spelling "errors". I speak American now. "Howdy!"

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Also, please excuse the excessive pinkness. A gal has to make a statement in an office full of dudes.

TGIF

I ate at TGIF.

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Nah, I lie. I ate in the caf and it was bad.

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Here's the truth: I THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY. I guess the semester is almost out, and my enthusiasm is wearing thin. The 2 hours of sleep last night and 3 cups of caffeine this morning didn't help. Getting my first B on a test probably didn't help either. And going to work and wrestling for two hours with heavy equipment that wouldn't work made me feel dong-dong-er.

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But there's nothing a nap can't cure...couldn't cure.

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And I'm coming home in 3 weeks. Me is excited. Me is very excited. *grins*

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I can't wait to shower in my own bathroom. Really. That's like the first thing I want to do.

Jacked up on Caffine and Joo Joo Beans

Don't ask me what Joo Joo Beans are. I'm jacked up on caffine and joo joo beans, so my use of strange vocabulary is justified.

So I pulled another 10 hour work day. Plus 2 classes on top of that. And a "20% of my grade" presentation in one of them. Tommorow I have a test and a paper due. Life is fun, don't you think?

Anyways, I killed 3 birds with one stone today. Muahaha. There was this talk on Science and Religion today...and they requested a sound (wo)man. Two of my classes offered extra credit to attend this talk. And I couldn't say no to that - hey?

I had a whooping big cuppa coffee right before my presentation to perk me up. And I stayed perked up through the extra-extra credit talk. Which was really funny and annoying. Funny coz everyone around me was falling asleep. And annoying coz I couldn't fall asleep.

I'm still all perked up. Maybe it'll tide me through my study session tonight. And maybe I won't fall asleep on my laptop while writing that paper. And maybe tommorow morning I won't try and cook my oats without water.

What a week!

What a week!

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Let's just say that the week I started writing my Research Paper (research paper spelt with CAPITALS) for English...

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...was also the week I had to go in for advising...academic advising, I'm not suicidal or anything...

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...was also the week I had to make an emergency trip to the grocery store...running out of deodorant is an emergency k?...

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...was also the week I had 2 quizzes...

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...was also the week prior to my Anatomy Exam on the bwain...God, why did you make my bwain so the complicated?!?!

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...was also the week I put in an extra 7 hours of work...

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...was also the week I had to prepare for a presentation worth 20% of my grade...

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...is also the week I promised to do 5 hours of volunteer work...

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...is also the week I've to attend some dungu formal dress up dinner.

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I'm not complaining...busy is good. Busy is very good. But what a week it has been! And it's still not over...

Spring Break: An Evaluation

I wasn't looking forward to Spring Break with a whole bunch of enthusiasm...maybe it was because everyone was going home...and I was not...I mean, I was looking forward to a break, but one whole week seemed a tad bit too long.

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But today, one of my international friends summed up what I felt about spring break: I like doing boring things.

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I like the everyday mundaneness of waking up, grabbing breakfast, going to work, preparing lunch, going back to work, going to the gym, taking an (extra) long shower, preparing dinner, and bumming for the rest of the night.

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Sure, work over spring break has been a long drawn process. I've "ghosted" 5 computers, installed about a million updates on them and hauled them from goodness knows what building back to my office.

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Sure, I spent 2 hours squirting windex and wiping it off from every single computer screen in every single classroom on this campus.

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Sure, chopping up veggies on a teeny chopping board and handling raw meat in a teeny little dorm room is like trying to fit an elephant in a fridge. (Ref: Elephant Joke. Har har?)

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Sure, spending 1-2 hours in the gym (almost) everyday can turn you into a stink bomb.

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...but I sure wish I didn't have to go back to class tommorow.

Generation 1, 2 and 3.

I gave birth to two papers this morning. What a joy it was to see them come out of the printer, brand new and pure and fragile and beautiful. They will come back to me scared with red ink...but that's another story.

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Say hi to my babies.

So boss was nice and gave me maternity leave yesterday...but today was back to work:

I snapped this pic while I was trying not to fall asleep in the audio room. Don't you have the naughty urge to randomly push buttons? I do. Did. Whatever.

Moving on...

Anyways, dad sent me pictures...so here is proof that he came last week:

Dad.
Dad and me in me room.

Okay, let me ask you SERIOUSLY. How old do I look? Or how young does dad look? Because the other day someone told me they thought dad was my brother.

Again.

Pa, you need to go and grow a middle aged man's gut. You ARE a grandpa now afterall.

14 hours later...

I really don't think I should do the "leave at 8am and come back at 10pm" thing too often...